January 07, 2009

Suicidal Sleep and Wakefulness

During certain periods, I think about suicide all day long; I go to sleep ruminating about it, and I awaken ruminating about it, picking up precisely where I left off. I didn't have that experience last night or this morning. And my surfing on the Internet before I slept did not depress me so much that I was angry and wanted to die.

Speaking all of which, I guess I should go and take 100 mg. of sertralina /sertraline (Zoloft) and 100 mg. of carbemazepina /carbemazepine (Tegretol/Tegrex), as my first dosages of these medicines for the day. Did I already take them? I can't remember, but a little bit extra is unlikely to hurt me.

1 comment:

vanishing point said...

one little trick i learned was to block out obsessive thoughts, by using a word repeated over until the bad thoughts go away, the other thing is to disassociate, children who have experienced trauma learn to do that, you can also imagine all of your bad thoughts that haunt you, imagine putting those thoughts in a container, and seal it, then put it somewhere in your mind. don't let your mind open the container.
maybe that might help.

i have trouble sleeping too.