A Pile of Mattresses

As I awaken to let the cat in, I am disoriented. I feel like I'm shopping I just know that I have left one of my bags behind, because my hand is suddenly empty. There is something missing. Ah, yes, I was tormented with thoughts as I went to sleep, wishing I was dead and fantasizing about ways to kill myself. Once having remembered what was missing, it all comes flooding back to me.

I dreamed that I was with my second wife, and my late brother Dannie, moving once again from one apartment to another. When we moved to this apartment it was full of other people's old stuff, piled high with hold mattresses and other detritus that we have to remove. Now, the apartment was piled high with our crap and we would have to move it to another apartment.

Suddenly, it was my mother's house, the house we grew up in, and it was on fire. The fire department arrived, put a ladder heavily against the outside wall of the kitchen, where the two windows were, causing a cup to fall off a shelf onto the floor. A white woman exclaimed, "The house is on fire! It's burning from the inside!" So, everyone ran out the front door and into the street, with my niece afraid to get "decompression." I told her hurriedly that no one gets "decompression" from going outside.

Then we were back to moving again, out of an apartment owned by a white man. We were pushing a queen size mattress down the street, along the curb, when a parked car forced us out into a lane of oncoming traffic. Back to the curb, I ran back to the apartment for some reason, maybe to get some help, leaving my wife to watch the mattress. When I came back, she had found her own solution. Some white men in a pick-up truck would drag the mattress along the street until the got it where it was going.

I was furious and angry at my then wife as I saw our mattress being destroyed, ripped apart by this brutal process, but she was proud of herself for arranging a mode of transportation. Once at our new apartment, as I began to reprove her, she cut me off and began to explain the overall benefits of being in this new apartment: It would be considerably less expensive . . .

* * * * * *

Now, we were in still another apartment and we were being pursued. Someone gave me the key and I hurriedly shut and locked the door. Someone very dangerous was after us and they were coming! I was in the middle of a war between hostile forces, the police and someone else. They adviced me to duck and stay in my car, so I did, then hiding from bullets above under a piece of plywood below. We were surrounded by "terrorists" in various stages of apprehension.

I went after an old white man with a big head. He was laying down and I punched him and battered him in the head over and over again, trying to kill him. But, he wouldn't die.